I wanted to take a quick minute to thank those who have left reviews on Amazon about The All-Sacred Gathering of the Girls. I know I’ve mentioned before how vulnerable it is to put a creative part of yourself out into the world; a place where anyone and everyone can see, read and comment about it.
I was excited to read a more recent review from a reader in Michigan. He got it! He understood the importance of writing a story for real people, with real-life issues, and the importance of teaching by example, not necessarily by direct instruction. If you are reading this, thank you for your very detailed review and willingness to read a story that is not on a National Bestseller List or Top 10 Picks from fill-in-the-blank-here.
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I am excited to share with you that I’m getting down to the final strokes of my second book! It has been a few years in the writing, but as goes any creative endeavor, it has surprised me along the way and been so much fun to write.
Get ready to meet Catherine, Cat, for short, her husband Scott, and their three kids: Taylor, Jack and Emily. Oh. And then there’s Sassy, the family’s Golden Retriever, who is also part of the Anderson clan. Welcome to the world of the normal– and sometimes funny– ups and downs of family life. I’m going to share some of it here … ======= Nothing ever prepared Cat for motherhood more speedily than the day the doctor pulled the bloody, mucousy baby out of her and announced, “Congratulations! It’s a girl!” Of course, she cried. What mom wouldn’t? Now here she was, fifteen years later, and crying again. Why? Why me? What have I done wrong? How am I going to make it? I never acted like this as a teenager! Is my daughter possessed? Was it even possible to be this tired? She knew she was running on fumes, what with all the mom-taxi services she was providing. Then there was the oldest-daughter-teen-drama that had taken front and center stage, not to mention her part-time job at the Chicken Shack, which was a real energy sucker. Catherine, Cat for short, felt like she was on a hamster wheel. At least the hamster could get off! She couldn’t. She took a swig of lukewarm coffee from her ceramic travel mug, which claimed her to be the World’s Best Mom. Yeah right, she thought. World’s Grumpiest Mom is more like it. She peered out the frosty windshield at the school, trying to be patient. Basketball practice was running late, as always. She wouldn’t mind so much if she didn’t have to rush her daughter Taylor to gymnastics at six. She also had supper to deal with, even though it sounded a heck of a lot easier to pick up a few pizzas, ready to go. Glancing out the window again, she saw Jack, her thirteen-year-old, trucking across the parking lot, loaded down with his school laptop, winter jacket (not on, of course), a bulging backpack and basketball. “Hey, mom.” Jack’s voice was getting deeper, a reality of puberty which Cat was still trying to get used to. Thud. Thud. Into the trunk went everything. “How was practice?” Cat asked as she carefully maneuvered into the rush-hour traffic. Navigating anywhere in and around the Twin Cities was not on her list of favorite things to do; that and driving in snowstorms. Her kids called her an old lady driver, which she was. Cat was lucky to stay in her lane of traffic, what with all the distractions the kids and dog provided. Three may not seem like a lot to some people, but in my little corner of the world, three feels like plenty most days. Then add Sassy, and that makes four. Sassafras, better known as Sassy, was the family’s golden retriever. Once a bundle of energy, the years had slowed her down and mellowed her out. She was Taylor’s best friend, and Cat could swear she was part-human. Cat snapped-to when her phone buzzed. It was probably her husband, wondering how soon she’d be home. Or maybe Emily, their nine-year-old. She turned on the Bluetooth. “Hey, it’s Cat.” “Hi hun. Do you want me to get anything ready for supper here? The fridge is looking pretty bare. I didn’t know if you were getting take-out?” God Bless Scott, Cat thought. He makes up for my brain farts. I forgot about going to the grocery store. “I was thinking of picking up some pizzas at Little Caesars. Is that okay? I’m almost home. I just got Jack from basketball.” Jack’s earbuds were in and he was nodding his head to some loud music, his floppy hair hanging over his eyes. “Sounds good, sweetie,” Scott replied. “Em and I are just hanging out doing her math. What are they teaching fourth-graders these days? Don’t get me started. And Tay’s somewhere, probably up in her room.” Cat saw her turn coming up. “Gotta go, I’m here.” She hung up. “Hey mom, can we order breadsticks, too? I’m super hungry, and lunch was hours ago.” “Sure thing, bud. You and your hollow leg. I think you could eat a whole pizza yourself and still be hungry!” Cat said, grabbing her overstuffed wallet. Receipts and coupons stuck out of it helter skelter. It was hard to maneuver in her seatbelt with her bulky parka on. Living in Minnesota made it a prerequisite to bundle up warm for about half the year. They were currently in February, one of Cat’s least favorite months. By then, winter felt like it was dragging on forever, and spring was not yet in sight. Valentine’s Day couldn’t even make up for it in her mind. Cat ordered, feeling sorry for the poor teenager stuck at the drive-thru window in twenty-below weather. She carefully set the food on the front seat. “Hey mom, can I have a breadstick right now?” Jack hung his head around the front seat. Cat just shook her head and handed him the bag. “Alright!” he cheered. “Don’t eat them all,” she said. A few minutes later, Cat turned into Red Oaks Heights, their subdivision. They had the blue house at the end of the cul de sac. Scott’s gray Prius was parked in the driveway. He must have a meeting tonight if he’s parked outside, Cat thought. I hope Taylor’s grabbed something to eat already. Why am I always in such a rush? Oh yeah, kids. Dog. Husband. Job. There aren’t enough hours in the day! “Mom! I missed you!” Emily greeted her at the door with a hug. Cat was trying to balance the pizza boxes, her coffee mug and mammoth purse. “Hey there, Em! How was school today?” Cat appreciated greetings like that from her daughter. It made up for her other daughter’s lack thereof. “Oh, school was school. Ms. Kay said I needed to work on flashcards at home, and Henry stuck his boogers under his desk, and Addy was playing with slime when the teacher wasn’t looking.” Cat raised her eyebrows, grabbing a stack of plates and some cups and putting them on the kitchen island. “Supper’s ready,” she yelled in the general direction of the stairs. “Taylor, we’re leaving in twenty minutes. Get ready if you’re not!” She heard a harumph come from upstairs, her mom-radar ears set for “Taylor time.” She took a deep breath, then sighed, trying to reign in her blood pressure, which could rise from one to ten in two seconds. One word: Taylor. She sighed again. Cat felt the lick of a wet tongue on her hand. She bent down, rubbing Sassy’s furry head. “Woof!” “Hey there, Sas! Did anyone feed you yet?” She gave her a quick hug around the neck. Sassy thumped her tail, looking up at Cat with her gentle dark eyes. Cat glanced at the food and water bowl, noticing they were empty. “Did anyone feed Sas?” she asked into the air. Emily and Jack were already chowing down on pizza, Taylor still wasn’t downstairs, and Scott was somewhere. “Mmphhhh,” Emily said, a string of cheese hanging out of her mouth. Cat just shook her head and filled the water bowl. She noticed she had a text from her boss at the Chicken Shack, no doubt begging her to work the weekend. Short-staffed. Waitressing was second-nature to her since she used to waitress in a pizza parlor during her college years. She pretty much felt like a waitress at home, too. “Look who’s home,” Scott said, breezing in from his home office. He was a project manager for a larger-sized healthcare company, and he split his time between working from home and at the office. He looked great and put-together, as always. He was wearing one of his new polo shirts. His dark hair had streaks of gray, which Cat thought made him look sexy. He stooped and gave her a kiss. Cat felt disheveled and tired. Her long hair was half frozen from being outside and her yoga pants were feeling tighter than normal, if that was possible. She had thrown on a fuzzy soft sweater in the morning and then managed to spill her coffee on a sleeve. It was also full of dog fur. She slipped out of his arms, her mind on the next activity that needed doing. Taylor. Gymnastics. Class started in 15 minutes! “Hey Tay!” she yelled, then turned around. “Oh, there you are. I hope you grabbed something to eat.” Taylor was wearing her leo, sweats and the ever-present gymnastics bun on the top of her head. She had a scowl on her face. Cat glanced at her husband, rolling her eyes. They both understood each other. No words were necessary. “M-o-m! What took you so long? I was like waiting forever for you! And I didn’t even know what to eat for supper. I have soooo much homework tonight, and I can’t get my back hip circles….” “You’ll be fine, let’s go.” Cat grabbed her purse and zipped up her coat. “Put on a jacket and hat, please. I don’t need you getting sick.” She heard another big sigh. “We’re so gonna be late, and it’s all your fault,” Taylor grumbled, grabbing her fifty-dollar water bottle off the counter (Cat called it her “forever” water bottle since Taylor had paid so much money for it). Sassy barked, nuzzling Taylor as she went out the front door. “Bye, Sas. Be good.” Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde, Cat thought, always amazed at how fast her daughter’s moods could change. One minute happy, the next minute cray cray. It’s like being on an emotional roller coaster every single day. How the heck am I going to survive three more years of this! No one ever prepared me for a fifteen-year-old’s drama. Cat backed out of the driveway, trying to steer clear of the big patch of ice at the bottom. Taylor was slumped in her seat, looking out the window. It was already dark out. Neighbor’s lights were blazing in their homes, and Cat wished she could kick off her boots, sit back on the couch, drink a relaxing glass of wine, and go absolutely nowhere. In your dreams, flygirl, she thought. Onward and forward. I am beginning to realize that life never slows down. Fun summer activities like swimming and playgrounds and going to the lake shift to busy fall activities. Cross country running. School. Various fall sports. Then it’s on to the winter.
As much as I love sunlight, I also enjoy the early evening darkness of the Midwest. It’s an opportunity to hibernate, even if just for a little bit. Sure, I’m still getting kids from various activities and attending Christmas concerts and running errands, but if I let myself, I can cozy up in the warm house, grab a book and go nowhere! Absolutely nowhere. I love these rare moments, and I’ll take them when I can get them. Just a mama bear hibernating in the cave of her house, eating some good junk food and gathering my cubs around me. I hope you get to take the time to take some time for yourself! I am an introvert. There’s no two ways about it. Give me the option of recharging my
emotional batteries at a party or in the middle of nature, and I’d pick the middle of nature, hands down. It’s so common now to hear the term introvert and extrovert. There are a bajillion surveys one can take to find out what they are. I am in the process of reading Laurie Helgoe’s book, “Introvert Power: Why Your Inner Life is Your Hidden Strength.” So far, it’s a great book! For all those introverts out there, you’re not alone. And for all those extroverts, well, you rock too! I wanted to share the blurb on the back of the book for those who may be interested: Are you an introvert? Psychologist and introvert Laurie Helgoe reveals that more than half of all Americans are. Introverts gain energy and power through reflection and solitude. Our culture, however, is geared toward the extrovert. The pressure to enjoy parties, chatter and interactions can lead people to think that an inward orientation is a problem instead of an opportunity. Helgoe shows that the exact opposite is true: Introverts can capitalize on this inner source of power. Introvert Power is a groundbreaking call for an introvert renaissance, a blueprint for how introverts can take full advantage of this hidden strength in daily life. Supplemented by the voices of several introverts, Helgoe presents a startling look at introvert numbers, influence, and economic might. Happy Reading! I am super excited to be working on my second novel (and no, it’s not a sequel!) Not that I don’t love Gwen and Jules and Ellie, but it’s time for something new. My next story is about moms and their teen daughters (the joys and not-so-joys), family life and having a best friend who’s a dog (that would be Sassy!) Being a mom is hard work, and every day presents new challenges. Some days it’s easier to get out of bed, start the coffee pot and be the early-morning cheerleader who is getting the kids out of bed and ready for school on time. And some days, it’s not so easy. Through it all, we persevere, as moms, because that’s what we have to do! As I work on my new book over the next number of months, I’ll give you little tidbits. It’s both exciting, and hard work, being a creator, but most especially, making the time. There will ALWAYS be something else to do (laundry, dishes, mom taxi service, more laundry, more dishes), but when we care about something, it’s worth the effort, even if it’s just for ten minutes. As my husband (and biggest cheerleader) says, “Just ten minutes!” and it usually turns out to be longer than that. So if you have something you’ve been putting off doing, just give it ten minutes. It’s official, we have a teenage driver. Gone are the days of innumerable stroller rides, chasing a toddler down the sidewalk before they run into the street, taking the First Day of Kindergarten picture on the front steps, selling friendship bracelets in the neighborhood, playing dress-up with friends. We’ve got wheels (and it’s not a double stroller!) Our sixteen-year-old just recently passed a big rite of passage – she got her driver’s license. I share this news in excitement (for her) and no small amount of trepidation (for me). I’m a “see the glass as half empty” sorta girl. I have to work really hard to ramp up my enthusiasm and positive vibes for many things, in general. So when it comes to handing over the keys to the car, I’m trying not to imagine all the things that could go wrong. I was pleasantly surprised on her first outing by herself- and subsequent drives- that God has given me a great amount of peace. I was calm. I was not counting down the time, not pacing the floor, not checking the windows. It really was a gift that I’m so grateful for. As the kids get older, I am having to learn how to let go. Isn’t that a hard lesson for all us parents, who love our kids so much and always want to protect them? Letting go. From teaching them how to take their first steps, and letting go of their little hands and cheering for them, to handing them the keys to the car and saying good-bye. Reminding them to be careful. Asking their Guardian Angel to please protect them. Letting go. Entrusting them back to God, who has entrusted them to us. I’m going to take a meander down memory lane, back to some of my earlier days of travel across the country. For those of you who have had the fine pleasure of taking a trip on a Greyhound or Trailways bus, you will probably understand what a treat the experience is (insert sarcasm here). Not! One such trip for me took me from the flat, greenery of Central Minnesota all the way down to the ‘dry heat’ desert of Gallup, New Mexico. Yes….that is a loooong way! I believe it was a two-day trip, spent stopping in every small town and local gas station along the way, changing buses in dirty and sketchy-looking bus stations. I was traveling to my friend’s wedding. One of the bus drivers, a big burly guy who looked like he had seen just about everything, announced on his bus, “Let’s make it a good day.” When we stopped at a rest stop, he said, “If you’re accidentally left behind, it’s 12 hours ‘til the next bus.” No one wanted that. Admittedly, it’s hard to have a good day on an interminably long and uncomfortable bus drive, where you are thrown in with every specimen of humanity possible. There was the heavily tattooed ex-con, just being released from prison, carrying his one plastic bag with a Bible and a few things in it. He had fifty dollars so he could start life over clean. He looked nervous, unsure of himself. The prison guard escort saw him onto the bus, then he was gone. There were the druggies exchanging drug stories and giving advice on how to get ahold of drugs illegally. “The key is to feel like you’re in control and then you enjoy it more,” one user shared. There was a worn-looking, anxious young lady who used needles and drugs whose husband was in prison, ex-husband was in Minnesota, and current boyfriend was Mexican. He was into hard porn. I can’t make these things up. And then… there were the Amish folks! No joke. They had a whole contingent in one of the bus stations, just chatting and having a great time. The bus subculture is like entering a different world. One minute you’re clutching your paper ticket with a heavy backpack on your back, the next, you’re scrunched into a seat, either really hot, or super cold (all depending on if the AC is working or not). If you try to sleep, good luck. A neck pillow is always a bonus, but for those unlucky travelers who weren’t thinking ahead, a serious crink in the neck is a guarantee if you try to get any sleep at all. I don’t want to paint a completely bleak picture of riding on a bus. There was an unexpected gift waiting there for me: the gift of sharing time and stories with complete strangers, and walking away feeling like I had made many good friends, temporary though they were. They were my new little bus community. We shared about our life, where we were going, how many kids we had, what made us anxious, the hard things of life. They showed care and concern. So many gifts. I was able to give the gift of my listening ear, while others gave their own gifts to me as we spent hour upon hour with each other, watching ever-changing scenery roll past our windows. Years later, I look back, smile and shake my head. I also feel extremely grateful for wheels of my own! The family minivan can’t be beat. Sure, we still don’t get anywhere very fast, but the trip is always worth it. We've had our busiest summer ever (hence the lack of blog posts this summer!)!!!
We started out June strong, with the slogan, "No Plans, No Promises." It was even written in marker on a paper, taped to the cupboard door for all to see. This slogan came about primarily due to kids asking, "What are we gonna do today?" and "Are we going anywhere?" and "But you promised..." We needed a new strategy. No Plans, No Promises! A great idea that meant for us that, in our flexibility, we weren't running everywhere, doing everything that everyone wanted to do! We went swimming a ton at Quarry Park (a unique local county park with awesome swimming quarries and trails). We also got to experience an iconic Central Minnesota landmark: Paul Bunyan Land! We trekked through the Mall of America, and even braved Nickelodeon Universe. Then there was the family bike trip on the Lake Wobegon Trail. We rounded out the summer with a road trip through the cornfields of Iowa and the rolling hills of southwestern Wisconsin. By the time the school year started, this mama was ready for some downtime! With all the kids in school, I still feel like I'm running to catch up with things. A little of this, a little of that... it all adds up! One day at a time is the secret, enjoying the present moment, even as I start working on my next book! I'm so excited that copies of my book are now at Barnes and Noble (in St. Cloud)! And... An article about me in the Central Minnesota Catholic! Here's the link to the article: https://thecentralminnesotacatholic.org/st-cloud-author-writes-about-friendship-motherhood-and-marriage/ I want to thank my dear, sweet friends who have supported me in my writing, and in my everyday mom-journey. They always know how to make me laugh and have a good time. Thanks, girls!!!
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